"THE ODDS" Archive

Week of Sept. 6 (BMW Championship)
That Tiger Woods was literally drooling when he first got out of his car at Cog Hill this week: 1-100
That Phil Mickelson will regret not playing this week: 100-1
That the Tour will somehow claim that their being paired together next Thursday and Friday is proof of the FedEx Cup Playoffs’ success: NO ACTION
LONG-RANGE PROPOSITIONS:
That the Tour will find some way to reengineer the 2008 schedule so that the Ryder Cup doesn’t directly follow the Tour Championship: 3-1
That if it doesn’t, at least three American Ryder Cuppers will skip the Tour Championship: 1-3
That by 2009 the FedEx Cup playoffs will have been humbly rechristened the FedEx Cup series: 3-1
That by 2009 the FedEx Cup playoffs/series will have been shortened to three events: 1-3
That if it is, one of its four original stops will reclaim its former place on the regular-season schedule: 1-3
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Week of August 31 (Deutsche Bank Championship)
That the TV ratings for Monday’s final round will be higher than those for Sunday’s Barclays finale: 1-5
That they will be lower if Tiger Woods misses the cut: 1-5
That if Tiger Woods misses the cut, Tim Finchem will be spotted on the ledge of a high-rise Boston hotel on Saturday evening: 1-1
That if asked, any given PGA Tour pro would identify the Ginn sur Mer Classic at Tesoro as a dish at a four-star restaurant: 1-1
That the next time either Rory Sabbatini or Tiger Woods is asked about the other, he’ll roll his eyes and say, “Next question”: 1-1
That on Friday and Saturday the ratio of spectators following Woods, Mickelson, and Singh will exceed those following Stricker, Choi, and Sabbatini by greater than 100 to 1: 1-1
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Week of August 23 (Barclays Classic)
That I will get at least five snarky e-mails per day from media brethren about the present boosterish background colors of this website: NO ACTION
That I would gladly sell my soul to FedEx in exchange for advertising support for this site: NO BRAINER
That Tiger Woods will be caught or passed this week in the FedEx Cup standings by at least three players: 1-1
That Tiger Woods will care: 3-1
Number of 2007 FedEx Cup events missed by other top-five players, as a result of Woods’ effectively giving them permission: UNDER/OVER 4
Per-day decrease in Barclays media member attendance attributable to Woods’ absence this week: UNDER/OVER 100
Per-day decrease in media buffet calorie consumption attributable to Woods’ absence: UNDER/OVER 500,000
LONG-RANGE PROPOSITIONS
That next year, the FedEx Cup playoffs will feature a built-in first-week bye for at least the top five players: 1-1
That next year, fewer than 101 players will be eligible for the playoffs: 1-1
Decrease in number of corporate boxes sold at 2008 Barclays as a result of Woods’ absence at 2007 Barclays: UNDER/OVER 10
Decrease in corporate boxes sold during entirety of 2008 FedEx Cup playoffs as result of Woods’ absence at 2007 Barclays: UNDER/OVER 30
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Week of August 16 (Wyndham Championship)
That the PGA Championship will be Tiger Woods’ last win of 2007: 3-1
That before the end of 2007 John Daly will better his T32 finish at the PGA: 30-1
That before the end of 2007 Woody Austin will better his second place finish at the PGA: 300-1
That both John Senden (47) and Carl Pettersson (48), the Wyndham Championship’s lone remaining Top 50 players, actually make it to their tee times without withdrawing: 1-1
That a member of the Greensboro Jaycees has called Mark Steinberg to ask for a refund of whatever they paid him to help land this week on the schedule: 1-1
That Sam Snead has rolled over in his grave about what’s happened in Greensboro: 1-1
That a Greensboro golf fan, having nothing better to do this weekend, will dig him up to check: 1-1
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Week of August 9 (PGA Championship)
That Tiger Woods will win this week, avoiding a majorless 2007: 2-1
That if he doesn't, he will not experience another majorless year before 2012: 1-12
That Phil Mickelson meant it when he said Tuesday that he considered the Players a major: 1,000-1
That the Europeans will capture their second straight major this week: 5-1
That if they do, Sergio Garcia will be the man to do it: 1-1
That an Australian will win a major before a European does again: 1-1
That the PGA, as usual, will be the fairest, most smoothly run of the year’s four majors: 1-5
That the moment it’s over, everyone will unjustly return to regarding it as the least important of the four: 1-5
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Week of August 2 (WGC-Bridgestone Invitational, Women’s British Open)
Special All-Even-Money Edition
That Tiger Woods earns his next win before Barry Bonds hits his 755th home run: 1-1
That Woods is the only person in the country who would rather spend a week in Akron than Los Angeles: 1-1
That Hunter Mahan will win another tournament before Ernie Els, Phil Mickelson, or Vijay Singh does: 1-1
That, with all of St. Andrews’ hazards again in play, any one Women’s British participant will manage a Tiger Woods-style bunker-free round: 1-1
That Hawaii-native Michelle Wie’s experience in the wind will enable her to beat at least half the U.S.-born players in the field: 1-1
That she won’t beat more than half the U.K.-born players: 1-1
That the absence of skirts and shorts from Natalie Gulbis’s wardrobe this week in Scotland will cause at least two photographers to burst into tears: 1-1
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Week of July 25 (Canadian Open, Senior British Open)
SPECIAL SLOW NEWS WEEK OVER-AND-UNDER EDITION
Number of (translated) US Dollars on Padraig Harrington’s 2007 tax filings as a direct result of winning the British Open: UNDER/OVER $5,000,000
Number of 2008 British Open participants who, the week before, will enter the Irish PGA Championship: UNDER/OVER 50
Number of US PGA Tour members completely unaware, as of Wednesday, that Joe Ogilvie was the winner of last weekend's US Bank Championship in Milwaukee: UNDER/OVER 75
Strokes in excess of his 1980 Muirfield Open-winning total of 271 that Tom Watson will take at the 2007 Senior British Open: UNDER/OVER 5 (OVER WINS ON MISSED CUT)
Strokes in excess of her 2006 Evian Masters second place total of 270 that Michelle Wie will take at the 2007 Evian Masters UNDER/OVER 10 (OVER WINS ON MISSED CUT)
Strokes in excess of his 1990 Muirfield Open-winning total of 270 that Nick Faldo will take at the 2007 Senior British Open: UNDER/OVER 15 (OVER WINS ON MISSED CUT)
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Week of July 18 (British Open)
That Tiger becomes the first man in over fifty years to three-peat as British Open champion: 2-1
That more than a handful of people outside of Australia and the British Isles truly appreciates how good Peter Thomson was: 200-1
That Butch Harmon, while commentating for Sky Sports, will overestimate Phil Mickelson’s chances of winning this week: 1-5
That Butch Harmon will be fully aware that he’s doing so: 1-5
That Sergio’s new belly putter will win him the Open: 10-1
That he’ll again wear last year’s all-yellow, Tour de France-tribute outfit on Sunday: 100-1
That a European will win the Open for the first time in eight years: 8-1
That if one does, his name will be Paul Casey: 1-1
That all four rounds will be played in warm sunshine, like last year: 20-1
That it will rain at least four times in those four rounds: 1-1
That during a particularly strong gale, a player will be injured by flying on-course signage: 1-1
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Week of July 11 (Scottish Open, John Deere Classic)
That Jean van de Velde is glad to have avoided qualifying for Carnoustie, and questions next week implying that he didn’t deserve to win the ’99 Open: 1-1
That Paul Lawrie wishes he could avoid playing at Carnoustie, and questions implying that he didn’t deserve to win the ’99 Open: 1-1
That Colin Montgomerie will win his second straight tournament this week at Loch Lomond: 10-1
That Colin Montgomerie will win his first major at Carnoustie next week: 1,000-1
LONG-RANGE PROPOSITION I: Will Zach Johnson win his second major championship before Colin Montgomerie wins his first? (Odds 10-11 on each player.)
LONG-RANGE PROPOSITION II: Who will be the first to win a PGA Tour event: Aussie phenom Jason Day, or American phenom Jamie Lovemark? (Odds 10-11 on each player.)
LONG-RANGE PROPOSITION III: Who will be the first woman to win an LPGA Tour event: Michelle Wie or Sam Alexis Woods? (Odds 10-11 on each player.)
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Week of July 4 (AT&T National, U.S. Senior Open)
That more than fifty politicans will attend this week’s PGA Tour event at Congressional: 1-2
That at least one will dream of having Tiger Woods on his or her party’s ticket one day: 1-200
That Tiger is a Democrat: 1-1
That Tiger is a Republican: 1-1
That we will ever really know, one way or the other: 1-200
That if he’s ever plainly asked, his reason for not replying will be, “Even Libertarians buy golf shirts”: 1-1
That former USGA head agronomist Tim Moraghan will miss tiptoeing between the ankle-breaker potholes at the Senior Open at Whistling Straits this weekend: 1-100
During a typical Champions Tour broadcast, that any given viewer will doze off at some point in the broadcast: 1-2
That anyone will doze off watching the oldsters try to survive Whistling Straits: 200-1
PARLAY: That at least one person will sleep through virtually all of Tiger Woods’ play in Washington AND That sleepers will include a young girl named Sam: 6-5
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Week of June 30 (U.S. Women’s Open; Buick Open)
That frenemies George W. Bush and Vladimir Putin will play golf together this weekend in Kennebunkport: 40-1
That 12-year-old Alexis Thompson will better the score of Michelle Wie at this week’s women’s US Open: 1-1
That either of them will be anywhere near the cut line come Friday afternoon: 40-1
That people like me will start ignoring sideshows and focus on the women’s game’s best players: 5-1 (but I’ll try)
That any single top GM executive will fail to attend the Buick Open this weekend at Warwick Hills: 100-1
That any single employee of former parts subsidiary Delphi will be in attendance: 100-1
That the Women’s US Open will draw better TV ratings than the Buick Open on Sunday: 1-1
That the women would outdraw the men that day were Tiger anywhere within 100 miles of Warwick Hills: 1-20
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Week of June 23, 2007 (Travelers Championship)
That a World Top Twenty player will win this week's Travelers Championship: 20-1
That more than four World Top Twenty players have ever heard of the Travelers Championship: 20-1
That the Tour will make good on Tim Finchem's promise to issue a list of banned substances this year: 1-1
That the Tour will actually start testing for those substances before the end of this decade: 100-1
That there is, at this moment, at least one paparazzo stationed outside the main gate at Isleworth: 1-1
That if the Woodses are leaving Isleworth, they're using the Bat-Exit: 1-1
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Week of June 16, 2007 (U.S. Open)
That anyone will repeat Johnny Miller’s feat of shooting a 63 at Oakmont: NO ACTION
That at least one player (in addition to David Howell) will withdraw due to rough-related injury: 1-2
That the USGA will feel badly about it: 1-100
That the ailing Phil Mickelson will miss the cut: 1-2
That Tiger Woods will feel badly about it: 1-100
That this Open will have a Cinderella like last year’s Kenneth Ferrie: 1-1
That his pants will (mercifully) be far less tight: 1-10
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Week of June 9, 2007 (McDonald's LPGA Championship)
That Michelle Wie will shoot an 88 at this week’s LPGA Championship: 1,000-1
That half her opponents are hoping she does: 1-1,000
That David Leadbetter will be dismissed as her swing coach by the end of 2007: 3-1
That the William Morris Agency will be dismissed as her agents: 300-1
That she will reach her 18th birthday (this October 11) without an LPGA win: 1-2
That she will reach her 18th birthday without any reporter asking her The Boyfriend Question: 1-2
That if a reporter does ask, her name will be Christine Brennan: 1-1